Earth, Wind and Fire!

I've made you wait long enough. I've decided to update my blog. First the good news, I survived my trip to Philadelphia. Now the bad news, I've lost my notes that I was going to use to write part 2 of my blog. Even more bad news, I don't remember why I went to Philadelphia. It was probably work related since Sheri didn't go. At least, I don't think she went. My memory isn't what I remember it being. Do I still have two kids? I hope so, I think I liked them.

There's a new tab on the page where you create your blog. I think it's new anyway. It says "Monetize". I assume that if you click on it, it will add pictures of paintings from the great French impressionist Claude Monet onto your webpage. This would seem to be a fairly obscure feature but who am I to argue with the geniuses at Google?

There's also a tab that says "Stats". From this fascinating page, I see that a grand total of 3 of my loyal followers use the Chrome web browser. To be perfectly honest, that's about 3 more than I would have guessed.

But enough of this silliness, if you can call it that. (Call it what you like, I've got bigger fish to fry.) This blog is about the weather. In Oklahoma, so the song goes, "The waving wheat, can sure smell sweet when the wind comes right behind the rain!" In a lesser known and rarely sung verse, we learn that waving wheat is also capable of giving off an odor of "sand" when the wind comes before the rain as has been the case for the last few months.

The lack of rain has greatly contributed to the wildfire situation that has plagued southwestern Oklahoma as of late. It hasn't contributed as much as the people that believe that the roadside is the appropriate receptacle for their cigarettes but it has contributed nonetheless.

A few thoughts about fire:

1. Fire is cool. Not literally of course.
2. Whenever someone talks about free speech, the "You can't yell fire in a crowded movie theater" exception gets brought up. Why is it always a movie theater? If I'm at the opera and the urge should strike, can I yell fire? How many people constitute a crowd? If I'm at the midnight showing of "Breakin' 2: Electric Boogaloo" and there are only 2 of us, can I yell fire? What if there really is a fire in a crowded movie theater, would I be safe from prosecution if I yelled "Rapid oxidation of a material in the chemical process of combustion, releasing heat, light, and various reaction products!" Can I whisper to those around me "Don't tell anyone but there's a fire in here. Let's all pretend that we have to pee."
3. Any list should have at least 3 entries.

If any of you have recently lost your house to a fire, I apologize for making light (see what I did there?) of the situation. I'll send you all of the Monets that I receive from this year's blog.

The Earth sucks. It's a gravity thing.